Waikikamukau

Waikikamukau, (pronounced as if saying "Why kick a moo cow?"), is a mythical place in New Zealand. New Zealanders believe it to be so remote and unpopulated it makes Eketahuna, a small remote rural town in the Wairarapa, look positively suburban.

Waikikamukau is an example of how a pretend Maori word can be created out of an English phrase. But it gives some insight into how Maori is written and recorded phonetically. Interestingly, a backwards translation of this word from Maori to English, even though it is not a Maori word, renders:

wai = water, liquid

ki = against, at, into, to, toward

ka does not translate, but ika = fish troop victim

mu does not translate, but mou = for you

and kamo = eyeball, eyepiece

kau = cow

Or roughly translated as Your victimised cow is in the watercourse or to answer the question posed by the word - so it falls in creek! or perhaps to watch it fall in the stream!

(If one were to do such a thing on a New Zealand dairy farm today, not only would one be subject to an animal welfare investigation but there would probably be a pollution abatement notice issued by the local council and the dairy company might suspend the farm's milk supply contract.)

See also: List of interesting or unusual place names

More Information

• English and Maori Word Translator
• New Zealand Expressions
• There's a photograph -a poem by Mike Crowl